I know I have already survived the worst days of my life. I know I am fearless. I know I am blessed with the best children, who continue to be a source of strength and pride. I know I am alone.
I have many friends - old, true friends - old acquaintances - and new friends who are also widows. My days are full with work, my evenings are booked with different activities, my weekends are wrapped around family activities. But I am alone.
My brain has a little whirlwind inside. There are just so many thoughts and nothing is sorted out. From the outside, I look like I am ok and my life seems organized. Then, I slow down a bit and the whirlwind starts spinning faster than ever. I have SO MANY blessings. I have made my peace with God. I have so many reasons to smile. But, I am alone.
In talking to other widows who had good marriages, there seems to be a common thread. We know what a good relationship is and we miss it. We all want to feel that again. I want to feel that again.
...and so I begin the next stage of my life...
