Christmas: done our way.

I guess it is true when they say "the older you get, the faster the time goes".  I feel like we were just lounging by the pool - and now we are getting ready to spend Christmas week with our families.

I am so glad we have decided to make the season more than just the "obligatory exchange of gifts".  Neither of us 'wants' or 'needs' a thing.  We work everyday to have a happy life, without stress or drama.  We truly enjoy each other's company - and that's a HUGE plus since we are both confirmed home-bodies.  After a couple years, our lives have nicely entwined and we are genuinely content all the time.  THIS is our gift to each other.  

It has been a wonderful year: a vacation, an engagement, a wedding, and the announcement of a new grandchild in 2019.  It will be good to see ALL our kids AND grandkids within a 4 day span - a perfect way to close out a year filled with blessings.  

Merry Christmas.... from us.

OCD? Nah, I call it a cute quirk

My prince and I spoke for a long time before we actually met.  One of the questions he asked me was, "Which way does your toilet paper face; over or under?"  I thought it was an odd question, as I had NEVER given this any thought, so I replied, "I have 3 bathrooms: one is over, one is under and one is a literal crap shoot".

Turn the clock ahead a couple years:  All 3 bathrooms in our home have the toilet paper coming over the TOP of the roll.  I was informed, quite a while ago, that this is the CORRECT way.  I laughed this off, once again - and thought to myself, if this is what makes him happy, so be it.  It was a tiny task that would bring him so much joy.

We spent this past weekend in a quaint hotel in Pennsylvania.  Shortly after checking into our room, my prince announced:  "The toilet paper was all wrong, but don't worry, I FIXED it"....

All I could do was smile and be reminded of those endless conversations leading up to our first date.  

He is special.... and he is all mine ...  I couldn't be happier.

we will grow by another 2 feet!

We are expecting a new granddaughter at the end of February.  Such excitement!!  My heart is so happy.

Letter to my new granddaughter,

"My precious angel, just anticipating your arrival has made my heart grow beyond what I ever thought was possible.  Your sister has given this family so much joy and she has paved the way for you - as she will do for the rest of your lives!  

Apparently, there is no "cap" on how much we can love.  When we first learned of your impending arrival, I remember feeling my heart beat just a little faster.  Simply hearing those words was enough to make me love you.

You will be blessed to have an amazing family who love each other so much.  I know all families love each other, but we are a special group.  We are loud and we are emotional.  We hug and kiss each other hello and good-bye even if we see each other everyday!  We will all teach you different things, because we are all good at something.  We make every gathering special - even if it is just a Wednesday night!  There are no boundaries in our family - we watch over each other and celebrate life.  We welcome everyone - all friends, and friends of friends easily become part of our family.

I love watching your mommy's middle expand as you grow.  I am feverishly working on a blanket for you (just as I did for your sister).  We are all counting down the weeks until you are here - then.... "Let the spoiling begin!!"

Love you to the moon and back,
Grandma 

My Leap of Faith

As you know, I jumped ship earlier this year and embarked on my own business.

I have a partner that I worked with for 18 years, but have never met in person.  Yes, I went into this venture with both eyes open.  I spoke to this person everyday, several times a day, for 18 years.  There was no questions that we would be perfect partners.

Two weeks ago, I took a trip to Texas.  I finally hugged the person that I had so much faith in.  He escorted me around our warehouse and offices.  It was the sweetest journey for me, as this was OURS!!  We have a common goal and superior work ethics.  We are a united front and are determined to succeed.  Sounds like a winning combination to me!

Someone was aligning all the stars for me.... happen-stances occurred at just the right time.  
I have taken many leaps of faith in my life..... but this leap was definitely facilitated by a higher power... So grateful to have "someone" watching over me.

You never know who you will touch in life...

I've known her since she was in middle school.    I remember vividly how she and her family traveled so far  to be at  Mike's wake.... she said she "needed to be there" as she practically grew up as part of our family.  

She was recently widowed with 2 young children.  My heart broke for her.  I understood how much her life was going to change.  I tried, so hard, to say the words I thought she needed to hear..... words I needed to hear just a few short years ago.  She had become a member in a club that no one wants to join.

I now hear that she has someone in her life.  Someone who makes her happy.  I hear that she is smiling again.  I am told that I was the inspiration for her to go on.  She drew from my strength and knew that if I could find happiness again, she was going to give it a try.

I am so grateful to have been a part of this young lady's life - both when she was an impressionable child and later, when she was going through the worst days of her life.  

Moral of the story: Just be who you are.  Don't let others change you.  You can only be the best "YOU".   You may never know who will cross your path .... or what an impact you will make on them.   Maybe, just maybe, you will be lucky enough to hear how you made a difference in someone's life just by being who you are.

We got this!

So it was bound to happen - our first stumbling block.  Something that just sits in the middle of our roadway and we have to figure out a way to get to the other side.  There are over 75 years of marriage between us - we've got this, right?

Yes, we got it..... but it was eye opening.  

We realized that our world is not just what happens between us  - we know how to do THAT well!   We live a peaceful, mundane (read that: 'without drama'), loving life.  At this point in our lives, all we want is to be happy.... everyday.  We both know that we are equally responsible for that happiness and that is our only goal.

It doesn't matter what the stumbling block was.  What matters is we found a way around it.  We did not let it upset the life we have both worked so hard to achieve.  

Maintaining our relatively new relationship at this stage of our lives has been surprisingly easy.  Both of us being widowed after long marriages, we knew what it took to have a happy life together.  The important things were already there: shared morals and values, a desire to love and be loved, and the ability to talk about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. 

There are bound to be other hurdles along the way.  That's a part of life.   But we have already lived through the worst days of our lives before we even met.  

We can handle anything.  

(The Prince read this and promptly asked me, "What was the stumbling block?"  So grateful to have this man at my side everyday.)

"cousins - loosely described"

We just returned from a "family" party in Jersey.  My cousins have hosted this party for the past 13 years - (other cousins, myself included, have taken turns hosting it years prior).  There can be up to 100 or more people in the yard at any given time.  This year, it was rather small - just 60 of us.  A nice portion of the group have shared DNA - the others married into the family or are good friends who have become family throughout the years.

We brought Jamie with us this year.  It was so nice introducing her to all her "cousins" - yes, we are all cousins.  The Prince once commented that he has second and third cousins and he just refers to them as "friends".   That will ALWAYS make me laugh.  In my family, if you show up for 3 consecutive events, you are a COUSIN.  And if you miss 3 consecutive events, we will complain about your absence,  but you will still be our cousin.

There is a strong bond amongst us; one set of shared grandparents.  All those Sunday dinners at Grandma's house... the good food, hugs and laughter, the comfort of being surrounded by so much love.  My cousins may miss a family party now and then.... but I can't think of any who opted to miss a wedding or a funeral.

Who wouldn't want to be our cousin??

Advice for my grandchildren

I have a wonderful life.  It is not without ups and downs - and there certainly has been richer and poorer, sickness and health.  I've experienced true love and sorrowful loss.

As this blog was always meant to be my diary of sorts for my grandchildren, I can't help but offer some advice now and then along with the anecdotes of my daily life:

Remember to take each day as it comes.  You cannot re-do yesterday or predict what tomorrow will bring.  You can only be present today - make the most of it. 

Learn lessons from your past -  not everything will turn out as well as you hope, but do not dwell on what 'might have been'.  Just make a mental note of what you could have done better for next time.

Never forget that no one EVER changed an outcome by worrying about what the future might hold.  If worrying burned calories, it might be worth a try, otherwise, it is just a useless effort that robs the day from you. 

Always choose to be kind.   You will feel better about yourself if you only see the good in people.  Negativity can easily creep into your life if you give it a place to take up residence.  Fill up your empty spaces with love and kindness.  I promise you will never regret it. 

Always choose to be happy.  YES, it IS a choice.  The days will pass, all of them will be 24 hours long.  You get to choose how to spend it.  Personally, I've been happy and I've been miserable.  Listen to an old lady, "Happy is WAY better".  

If you are going through hell - KEEP GOING - don't stop to take pictures!  I've been through hell so many times, I could give guided tours!  Remember, if you walk a straight line,  you can only go half way in, then you will be on your way out.  Don't look back... it happened.... it's over.  Life goes on.  

Get used to the fact that not everyone will like you.  If people WANT to like you, they will find 100 reasons to like you.  If someone does not want to like you, they only need to find one flaw that will resonate.  Bottom line, just make sure you like yourself.  Let everyone else make up their own minds.

Believe only half of what you see - and NONE of what you hear!!

Be grateful everyday.  

Remember that God answers all prayers - and sometimes, the answer is "no".

Last tip for the day:  MAKE MEMORIES!  Enjoy all that you do.  Love with all your might.  Laugh until it hurts.  When in doubt, always give a hug.  That is how you make a memory.  

Old Dog, New Tricks?

It has been over a month since I resigned my position of 18 years.  I was a little apprehensive, at first.  Leaving the house by 7:00am was the norm for so long, I was worried that "having no where to go" each day was going to be a huge adjustment for this old lady!

Jump ahead a couple weeks:
Having my own business has been the most exhilarating experience EVER!  Being a self-motivated individual, there was NO chance of me giving less than 100% to this endeavor.  My body adjusted to the new lifestyle in about 10 minutes.

Before: Jump out of bed, shower and dress, feed dog, have coffee, kiss the Prince good-bye - battle traffic to get to my office.  Work 8 straight hours and battle traffic to get home.

Now:  Mosey out of bed, feed dog, have coffee, read the paper, have breakfast with the Prince and kiss him good-bye as I head back up the stairs to my office.  There is a shower at some point during the day.... and sometimes I put on real clothes rather than just clean pajamas!  There is nothing but serenity in my office - even while putting out fires.  There are no raised voices.  Around noon, I venture downstairs to have lunch with the Prince.  If the weather is nice, we even lay in the sun for a while before I head back to my little haven.  When I feel I am done for the day, I close my door and resume my life as a treasured fiancee'.

There have been some crazy changes in my life these past 3 years.  I had no idea where my life was headed.  I took more than one "leap of faith".  Someone is watching over me, because I seem to always wind up in a better place than I was before. 

I remain eternally grateful.

Make a sharp left turn - I am heading that-a-way!

So, I took another leap of faith and left my job after 18 years.  Who could have predicted such monumental changes in my life in these past 3 years??  

There is definitely an "outside force" leading me down new paths.  In these past years, there have been so many signs along the way, gently guiding me to make huge, life-changing decisions.  Whenever there was a little doubt, there would be another sign assuring me to keep going.

I always told my kids that you can not live your life while you are looking backwards.  It is hard for me to NOT look over my shoulder to see where I have been.  But, I always promise myself to 'just take a glimpse' and then focus my eyes on the road ahead.

As with all my decisions these past few years, I am excited about what the future holds for me as I walk this new, challenging path.  

My life has had many ups and downs, twists and turns.  I have learned how important it is to 'stay present in the moment'.  A task I am still trying to perfect.  I seem to have it under control during the day..... it is the middle of the night that is giving me trouble.  Hey, I'm a work in progress!

I am proud to say that I have one ritual that will never wane.  As each day unfolds, the first order of business is always to be thankful for all my blessings.  Afterall, gratitude is the key that unlocks the door to happiness.

Grateful for the Winter Blues!

It's been a crazy long month.  Between rain, snow, frigid temperatures and this Upper Respiratory Thingy that the Prince and I have been passing back and forth, our extra-curricular activities have been severely limited.  Fortunately for us, we are both "home-bodies" and the 'confinement' has not been a punishment at all.  

We have managed to pass the days by reading, doing crosswords and jigsaw puzzles.  We watch movies and catch up on the endless shows on our DVR.  We cook together and sometimes even manage a little house cleaning. 

It is nice that we always seem to be 'on the same page'.   I am sure our easy-going attitudes are the result of just wanting a happy life together.   Having come from long (good) marriages and losing our partners has definitely changed us.  I believe we have a different perspective on life now.  We understand that all the little things (the everyday things that might annoy other people) do not matter at all.  We know how precious and delicate life is.  

Whereas neither one of us is religious, we both have deep faith.  Several times a week, at least one of us will mention how grateful we are for our good life together.  We both thank God for all we have everyday.  

If we can teach but one lesson to our grandchildren, I would choose Gratitude.

Happy First Birthday, Jamie

Happy Birthday, Jamie!!  I said this to you on the night you were born, and here it is one year later, already...

You have brought us more joy that you will ever know.  We have watched you grow from a little marshmallow into a feisty one-year-old.  Your face holds endless emotions and you never cease to make us laugh.  

After raising our own families, it has been a treat to share in your development.  We remember the milestones of our own children, but we were so busy with life, that we often forgot to revel in the miracles that a child offers.   We are so fortunate to have you close-by and have the opportunity to see you often and witness your tiny achievements.   

You might never realize how much you are loved.... from Heaven down to earth.   You are blessed to have Grandparents who see, hug, and kiss you all the time.  You also have a Papa in Heaven who smiles down on you and watches over you everyday.

Jamie, you are such a blessing to this family.  We can't wait to see what the future holds for you.  Happy Birthday, little one.

Love you dearly,
Grandma and Grandpa

Partners!!

Grandpa and Jamie

4 Generations 

Where should we go next? The back yard?

We recently returned from a vacation.   Spending every moment with someone, day and night, for days on end is a true testament of compatibility.  

I am not really sure what exactly makes us click:

• we read
• we relax in the sun
• we do crosswords
• we eat
• we like an occasional cocktail
• we dance
• we can talk about anything
• we can be quiet together
• we are grateful

I am thinking it is probably a winning combination of all those things. 

With the exception of that job I go to each morning, for us, everyday is like being on vacation.

Am I not living up to YOUR expectations?

As we began this new year and I celebrated my birthday, I was saddened about the people who are no longer a part of my life.  (I am not talking about Mike, as he will NEVER abandon me!  He will always be a part of my life.)

I am talking about the people who have chosen to judge me.  The 'old friend' who claimed that I am not the same person I was.  GUESS WHAT?  I will NEVER be that person again!  How could I be?  That person will never exist again.  I am figuring that this is the same complaint of the others who have decided it is best to keep their distance from me.  

Let me clear up some points for those that are curious:
1.  Widowhood is NOT contagious.
2.  I am single, but I am not a threat.  
3.  I was forever changed when he died.  My life, as I (you) knew it, ceased to exist.
4.  I had to redefine myself and my life.  I had to forget all the future plans that I had in my head and start over.
5.  This happened to ME, NOT YOU.
6.  Lastly, it is ok if you can't handle the new me.  I am a lot stronger now than I used to be.  I am living my new life now.  I did not choose this path, but I am on it. 

I am luckier than a lot of people.  I have met someone wonderful who accepts me just the way I am.  He is not threatened by my independence.  He sees all that is good in me.  He soothes my heart when it is hurting.  He closes his eyes to my shortcomings.  He has accepted me as a package deal and has welcomed my children (and dogs) into his life.  He makes me laugh every single day.
     

We fell in love.  We have made the conscious decision to "live happily ever after".  We both know how precious life is and we live a good life.  

This may NOT meet your expectations of me.  Obviously, I have higher standards.

Close the book on 2017

We thoroughly enjoyed the holidays this year.  We hosted some and were guests, as well.  I am a "planner" so there was no 'last minute rush' for anything.  We were able to really visit with everyone instead of being "chief cook and bottle washers".  The days were comfortable and happy (read that: No Drama).  I am just going to call it  "Our First Christmas Miracle".

We have been enjoying the "post-holiday season".  Having no plans and the bonus of a snowstorm that kept us house-bound seems to be what we do best.  You know you are with the right partner when "staying home" is your favorite thing to do.

Our "to-do-list" is very short at this time.  The only thing on it is: RE-CHARGING OUR BATTERIES....... It is taking longer than I thought...... I think our batteries are solar powered.  We need some sun.