Happy First Birthday, Jamie

Happy Birthday, Jamie!!  I said this to you on the night you were born, and here it is one year later, already...

You have brought us more joy that you will ever know.  We have watched you grow from a little marshmallow into a feisty one-year-old.  Your face holds endless emotions and you never cease to make us laugh.  

After raising our own families, it has been a treat to share in your development.  We remember the milestones of our own children, but we were so busy with life, that we often forgot to revel in the miracles that a child offers.   We are so fortunate to have you close-by and have the opportunity to see you often and witness your tiny achievements.   

You might never realize how much you are loved.... from Heaven down to earth.   You are blessed to have Grandparents who see, hug, and kiss you all the time.  You also have a Papa in Heaven who smiles down on you and watches over you everyday.

Jamie, you are such a blessing to this family.  We can't wait to see what the future holds for you.  Happy Birthday, little one.

Love you dearly,
Grandma and Grandpa

Partners!!

Grandpa and Jamie

4 Generations 

Where should we go next? The back yard?

We recently returned from a vacation.   Spending every moment with someone, day and night, for days on end is a true testament of compatibility.  

I am not really sure what exactly makes us click:

• we read
• we relax in the sun
• we do crosswords
• we eat
• we like an occasional cocktail
• we dance
• we can talk about anything
• we can be quiet together
• we are grateful

I am thinking it is probably a winning combination of all those things. 

With the exception of that job I go to each morning, for us, everyday is like being on vacation.

Am I not living up to YOUR expectations?

As we began this new year and I celebrated my birthday, I was saddened about the people who are no longer a part of my life.  (I am not talking about Mike, as he will NEVER abandon me!  He will always be a part of my life.)

I am talking about the people who have chosen to judge me.  The 'old friend' who claimed that I am not the same person I was.  GUESS WHAT?  I will NEVER be that person again!  How could I be?  That person will never exist again.  I am figuring that this is the same complaint of the others who have decided it is best to keep their distance from me.  

Let me clear up some points for those that are curious:
1.  Widowhood is NOT contagious.
2.  I am single, but I am not a threat.  
3.  I was forever changed when he died.  My life, as I (you) knew it, ceased to exist.
4.  I had to redefine myself and my life.  I had to forget all the future plans that I had in my head and start over.
5.  This happened to ME, NOT YOU.
6.  Lastly, it is ok if you can't handle the new me.  I am a lot stronger now than I used to be.  I am living my new life now.  I did not choose this path, but I am on it. 

I am luckier than a lot of people.  I have met someone wonderful who accepts me just the way I am.  He is not threatened by my independence.  He sees all that is good in me.  He soothes my heart when it is hurting.  He closes his eyes to my shortcomings.  He has accepted me as a package deal and has welcomed my children (and dogs) into his life.  He makes me laugh every single day.
     

We fell in love.  We have made the conscious decision to "live happily ever after".  We both know how precious life is and we live a good life.  

This may NOT meet your expectations of me.  Obviously, I have higher standards.

Close the book on 2017

We thoroughly enjoyed the holidays this year.  We hosted some and were guests, as well.  I am a "planner" so there was no 'last minute rush' for anything.  We were able to really visit with everyone instead of being "chief cook and bottle washers".  The days were comfortable and happy (read that: No Drama).  I am just going to call it  "Our First Christmas Miracle".

We have been enjoying the "post-holiday season".  Having no plans and the bonus of a snowstorm that kept us house-bound seems to be what we do best.  You know you are with the right partner when "staying home" is your favorite thing to do.

Our "to-do-list" is very short at this time.  The only thing on it is: RE-CHARGING OUR BATTERIES....... It is taking longer than I thought...... I think our batteries are solar powered.  We need some sun.

Our Christmas Letter

We have received a few Christmas letters lately and that made me think about what we would write should the need arise: 

January:  
I turned 60 - I never paid much attention to age, but it is a milestone, nonetheless.   The Prince and I went to Florida for a quick get-away.  We spent 10 days together, day and night and we STILL wanted to be together after that!
Happy Birthday: Brianne, Courtney, Dennis, Christian, Lisa, Michael

February:
The Prince and I became officially "engaged".  He surprised me with a pez dispenser and a ring for Valentine's Day.  Yes, "we are one", as he has proclaimed many times.  Two days later, we sat in the waiting room of a hospital anticipating Jamie's birth - "our" first grandchild.
Happy Birthday: Jamie 

March:
Serious renovations continue on the house.  The family room, bathroom and dining room have all been "made-over".  We are now moving the show upstairs!  We have been busy shopping for the Master Suite Project.  

April:
We shared a hospital room for a couple days - Well, he had the bed, I had the chair - but he beat pneumonia in record time!  And the Master Suite is complete!
Happy Birthday: Samantha and Allison

May:
Put my house on the market.  Sold my house.  Short story and a happy ending.

June:
The family grows by another 2 feet!  We welcome Colette!!  We celebrated the Prince's birthday - YES, EVERY YEAR is a milestone!
Happy Birthday: Bobby, Colette, James

July & August:
The 8 weekends of unending "yard work" paid off!  Enjoyed our yard and pool - and was so happy to share the accommodations with our family.... 
Happy Birthday: Aidan, Gretchen, Napoli

September & October
Our renovations continued outdoors.  I earned my "union card" as the Prince taught me how to build decks and erect sheds.
Happy Birthday: Suse, Eve, Michelle

November:
Prepared for the holiday season by putting up "Our first Christmas tree" before Thanksgiving!
Happy Birthday: Brett, Ryan, Stephanie

December:
Looking forward to celebrating Christmas with our enormous family.  So grateful to count our blessings everyday.
Happy Birthday, Oliver!

It's a little boring, but it is OUR life - and WE LOVE IT!

....another blessing....

The Prince and I recently went to my nephew's wedding.  I knew half the people there, many of whom I had not seen in a couple years.  It was truly my pleasure to introduce the Prince as "My Fiancé” to those who had not met him yet. 

It warmed my heart to see how these people (whom I know for decades) warmly greeted my Prince.  They shook his hand and  embraced the moment.  Every single one of them would hug me afterwards (many with tears in their eyes) and say, "It is so good to see you so happy, once again."

There was a lot of love in the room that night..... Sure, it was a wedding and everyone was there for the bride and groom..... But, for a while, I felt like the most loved person there.   

New Traditions

The Prince and I recently put up our Christmas tree.  We both have decades of Christmases under our belts.  We have wonderful memories of the past - our own childhood and watching our children's excitment throught the years.

It makes sense  that we cannot have traditions when we have no history.  At this stage of our lives, I think it is wise to sit back and watch as our children create the traditions.  We can happily  become participants in their lives as often as we are invited. 

This is our time to make new memories.  This  tree and  ornaments are all new..... they  are representative of our life.  A new beginning after suffering sorrowful losses.   

That tree makes me smile everyday.  I think about how we carefully picked it out - and how we shopped for all the ornaments.  Lots of smiles, giggles and hugs that day....

My Christmas wish - I wish all our childen will realize how precious a good relationship is.... how it is a wonderful gift when two people make a commitment and make that commitment a true priority in their lives.  

Thankful for my prince.  Thankful for our wonderful life.  

Re-writing the script

As the holidays approach, once again I find myself looking back over the years  - with smiles and tears.

I was so young when I married - but I knew it would last forever.  He filled my heart in a moment and I knew there was nothing that would ever tear us apart.  Move the calendar ahead 38 years and I realized there was something that would come between us.  "Til death do us part" was my new reality.  This was not part of my plan.  I wrote the story - this is not how it was supposed to end.  It was MY story - how dare God change the ending....

Time goes by.....

Along comes a man who also fills my heart in a moment.  Could this be real?  This was not in my book.  He is loving and warm.  He has his prioirites in order.  He is widowed after a very long marriage, as well.   He is a package deal (kids, their partners, and grandchildren).  He makes me laugh.  He loves me.

I'm am forever grateful that God has decided to be the editor of my story.  

I wanna be a Teamster!

The Prince and I have worked feverishly in the yard to make things neat and orderly.   We put up 2 new sheds in the pool area - one at either end.  It was so nice to have a place for everything, and everything is it's place.

It was SO nice, in fact, that we just kept going.  Next, we decided we needed a shed behind the existing wood shed on the side of the house.  First step: build a deck to support this shed.  This entailed 2 trips to Home Depot to get the necessary 4x4's and 1x6's.  Happy to say, the deck was built in one afternoon.  Erecting the shed, however, seemed to take days!!  There were a few hiccups - mostly, injuries sustained by me (ceiling joists falling and hitting me, a slip of a mallet to catch my finger....) Eventually, it was completed and it was worth all the work.

Well, like the classic book, "If you give a mouse a cookie"..... our construction continued.  The Prince declared that we needed a proper walkway (read that 8'x40') to get to the newly erected shed.  This consisted of a huge wood delivery from Home Depot.  Who knew building decks would be so much fun (?).  We also  replaced and enlarged a decked area on the other side of the house for our trash cans and BBQs.  

I am proud to say that I now have my own Screw gun and The Prince has promoted me from Apprentice to Foreman!  

I am thinking, with the Winter fast approaching, I'd better come up with some indoor projects before the Prince runs out of steam.  (After all,  I need to perfect my new found skills....)

"On the road again"

We recently took a trip to visit The Prince's daughter and her family.    There is a lot of planning when we embark on this journey.  Hotel reservations, arrange boarding for the dogs, stop the paper, pack the car , wrap some gifts for the kiddies......  you get the idea.

Finally, we hit the road!  We are mentally prepared for a 4 hour road trip.  We have an array of things to listen to (but we usually talk most of the time) .  - I pack a variety of snacks: salty, sweet, crunchy, chewy - NOTHING HEALTHY.  We expect traffic at the usual locations and finally, we are out of New York!  

It was a delightful ride - the Delaware Water Gap was an array of color.  The music was especially entertaining - we sang our hearts out!  THEN, out of nowhere, we are forced to merge lanes and travel single file "at the speed of a snail.....going uphill...on an icy surface".  We did 2 speeds - SLOW and STOP.  What should have taken 30 minutes, took over 2 hours.   There is no amount of snacks that could placate a saint in those conditions!   Eventually, we made it to our hotel.  We both fell soundly asleep knowing that the next day was going to bring a flurry of activities with the grandkids.

We had an early breakfast and headed over to start our day.  When 2 kids scream with delight and run into our arms, we both know that no amount of traffic will ever stop us from making this trip in the future.  It was a happy, busy weekend  - we made wonderful memories.  

You know everyone had a good time when it is so hard to say good-bye.... "...'til next time, little cherubs...."

a sweet moment

Saw a TV show last night where the character was lamenting over the death of his wife.  He was wondering if he would ever be in love again.  His friend told him that he will most definitely find love again and his tombstone will read, "was fortunate enough to be loved by 2 wonderful women in his lifetime".

I reached for The Prince's hand   -  he squeezed it and said, with a tear in his eye..... "Yes...and you will have been loved by two wonderful men..."

"Grandparents Day"

"Grandparents Day" seems like a silly holiday created by the greeting card companies.  Of course everyone reveres their grandparents!  Who else loves you unconditionally while breaking all your parents'  rules???

My Grandmother was a wonderful role model, mentor, advocate and friend.  She taught me so much without ever lecturing me.

I remember standing on a little bench and ironing handkerchiefs.  I was SO excited when I graduated to pillow cases.  To this day, the smell of steam coming out of my iron brings my grandmother to me.

I remember frying meatballs for the first time in her well-seasoned cast iron frying pan.  "Don't touch them until they have browned!"  Today, I use a similar frying pan and her technique has NEVER failed.

I remember her telling me to "change the air" in the baby's nursery.  All year long, she would have me  close the nursery door and open all the windows in there to remove the bad air and let in the fresh air.  I still do that in our bedroom!

My grandma told me that babies need to cry now and then.   It helps their lungs grow.  She proclaimed that hiccups helped their "insides to get bigger" - and (my personal favorite) when babies smile while they are sleeping, it's because an angel is talking to them.

My grandmother made every visit to her like a holiday.  She went to several different stores to get the groceries.  She cooked all our favorite dishes and sent us home with plenty leftovers.  There was always a special treat in her candy dish - and she emptied that dish into a little bag to send home with us, as well.  

I am so blessed to be able to close my eyes and picture my grandmother's hands.  I can still 'smell' her perfume.  I am named after my Grandmother ....... we called her Grandma Angela.

I have asked that Jamie call me, "Grandma".... it will be a wonderful tribute to my grandmother.

A Different Life

Life is so different these days.... Being a wife and mother for so many years, there are things ingrained in me that are just hard to "undo", but certainly much has changed.

I am no longer a wife.... I am choosing never to be a "wife" again.  I am not 20, (yes, that's when I got married!).  There are too many things that complicate a "legal union" at this stage of our lives.  That being said. I remain a "treasured fiance'" - and I am happy.  The Prince and I have a comfortable life together.  We have slowly defined our roles in the house.  Sometimes he takes the lead, sometimes I do.  We work well as a team, no matter what the project.  We both understand that a happy, successful relationship is "give and take" - NOT 50/50!  Let's face it, between us, we have over 75 years of marriage under our belts.  We entered into this relationship wanting the same thing - a happy life with a partner by our side.

I am still a mother.  Have been for nearly 40 years.  That will never change.  I am a parent, confidante' and role model to my children and my sons/daughters-in-law.  I am a "pseudo-parent" to my kids' friends when they need a shoulder or advice. I am a Grandma, Guga and Nanny to a host of little ones.

I have found that life will put many people in my path and each one will help define me as a person.  I am pleased to see that I am still learning, growing, and improving (I hope).  Each chapter brings new challenges and small changes.  I realize that I am a "work in progress".  

I must never forget that life can take a sharp turn, at any given moment.... but I still make plans - I like to give God a good laugh now and then.

Turn the page...

It surprises me how such a strong willed individual like myself can feel so unnerved at times.  Vulnerability has no boundaries....

My house is sold.  For the first time in 37 years, I am not a home owner.  It's a little like flying without a parachute.  Suffice it to say, I have taken a serious "leap of faith".

I believed this man when he said:  "I love you".  
I trusted him when he said, "I will never hurt you". 
He stole my heart when he said, "We are one". 

And so begins the next chapter of my life.

No Four Leaf Clover Required!

In my quest for a gratitude-filled life, I often look to my Prince and think how blessed I am to have found such a good man, (a second man), in my lifetime.  He is patient and kind, giving and loving.  To me, these are the most important qualities a man can have.

I hear people telling me over and over how "lucky" I am...... they said it about my marriage and they are now saying it about this relationship.  I've said it before and I will SCREAM it from the highest mountain.  LUCK HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!!!

A successful relationship is made up of 2 parts:

•  Two willing participants who want the same things in life.  
•  Two people who have the same morals and beliefs.  
•  Two individuals who want to work as a team to have a good life.  

It is not enough to "find" the right person..... you must be the "right partner".

I promise you, there is no luck involved.

The Bucket List

The Prince and I were watching TV the other night when a woman talked about her "Bucket List".   The mere mention of this list pushed my brain to the limits! 

Whereas I am certainly in the "last half" of my life, I have never given much thought to making a Bucket List.  I have heard many people talk about travel and exciting adventures.  I've even heard them talk about death-defying activities (i.e. skydiving!).  I can honestly say that I could die  peacefully without having experienced any of those things.

Not sure I have an actual list - but I know there were always things I wanted to experience in my life:  

I wanted to be in love - and I've been graced with the opportunity to have that TWICE.   My son said it best: "How lucky are you to have been blessed with 2 wonderful men in your life?"

I wanted to be a mom -  I am a mom, a step-mom, a 'second' mom, a mother-in-law and a grandmother!  I savor every moment - all the pride and joy along with the trials and tribulations.

I wanted to be happy - the day I realized that happiness was a choice was a true turn around for me.  Happiness IS a choice for EVERYONE and I choose it everyday.  I am sure there is a long list of things that are not 'perfect' in my life, but, thankfully I can't really think of any at the moment.  I can, however, make an unending list of all that is good in my life!

I am thinking I have achieved my "bucket list".  I am grateful that I recognize all that is good in my life and I never take a day of it for granted.    

And the family grows by another 2 feet!

There is nothing more exciting than welcoming a new baby to the family:

                                                                        Oliver

                                                                             Eve

                                                                  Samantha

                                                                       Jamie

                          Would all like to introduce you to:

                                                                  "Colette"

Welcome to the family, Colette.  There are many uncertainties in this world - but one thing you can always count on:  You WILL be loved!

5/26/15 Two years later

Mike,

It's hard to believe that 2 years have passed since you've left this earth.  Early on, I thought I was going to die of a broken heart.  The chest pains were fierce and they were real.  I soon came to realize that it was simply grief.... the physical manifestations of the saddest emotion.  I later understood that this pain was the result of losing someone that I had loved so much.  I am truly grateful for having loved so deeply and being so loved by you.  It was, indeed, worth the subsequent heartbreak.   

Eventually, I learned that I was not a helpless widow, but a very capable woman whose heart hurt.  Because of your love for me, I knew that I did not want to spend the rest of my life without feeling that kind of love ever again.

Turn the pages to 2 years later.  I have met a wonderful man and have allowed myself to fall in love once again.  We often talk about you and you remain alive in my heart, afterall, you taught me how to love and be loved.

The kids are amazing.  Your sons are truly wonderful men that would make you so proud.  They both watch over me - from a safe distance - while tending to their own families.  They are smart, witty and talented.  There is no project that they will shy away from.  I can see so much of you in both of them.  You taught them well... 

Your daughters are strong, vibrant women.  They, too, keep a watchful eye over me (from a safer distance!).  They speak their peace and demand respect.  They are intelligent, beautiful inside and out and KIND.  I am enjoying watching their lives unfold. 

Our chldren are all supportive and loving, not only to me, but to each other - and that's the greatest tribute to US.

Jamie, our newest granddaughter, is delicious.  That little angel has softened all our hearts.  She is truly proof positive that life goes on.  

I have changed in many ways since you left.   I don't take crap from ANYONE!!  I have learned to put toxic relationships on a back burner - where they cannot hurt me.  I stopped watching over the kids like a mother-hen.  I am no longer their safety net - they are MY safety net now!  I am mindful of all things in nature - as you would point out over and over.  I still look for your signs, and when they appear, they always make me smile.

Rest in peace, as I am fearless and I am happy, once again.

Is it Wednesday? Another Mother's Day....

Once a year , on the second Sunday in May, America celebrates Mother's Day.  More flowers are purchased on this occasion than any other.  Restaurants are bombarded with families.  Hallmark has a field day.

My children have asked me repeatedly about this coming Sunday.  My answer remains the same each time.  No need to fuss on this Sunday.  

I am blessed to have children who make me a part of their everyday lives.  I hear from them regularly (read that: everyday) and I see them often.  They check on me, they confide in me, they ask my opinion.  They show their love in the most subtle ways everyday.

I am so proud to be the mother of these kids.  I don't need a National Holiday to be recognized as a good mom.  They let me know it everyday.....

Another step forward....

So my house is up for sale.  Another step forward in this new chapter of my life.  The house is way too big and it is silly to carry that expense at this stage.  The kids are all supportive of my decision.

My children were not raised in this house, therefore it is not so hard to let it go.  We made wonderful memories there - had lots of family functions.  Those times will live forever in my heart.  

What does amaze me is how much crap we accumulated in the last 13 years!!!  AND, there are boxes in the garage that have never been opened since we moved them here!!   Everyone knows how happy I am when I am throwing stuff away.  The Prince often jokes that if he stands still for too long, I will either wash him or toss him in the garbage!

I must give accolades to Uncle Little Michael (aka, The Godfather) for making this as stress-free as possible.  He has boxed things, tossed things, and moved things - all with a smile on his face.  He would often say, "Mom, what is causing you the most stress?" - then he would do something about it. 
Thank you, my son, for all that you do.

I could not have predicted where life has taken me these past 2 years.  I am a firm believer that God has His plan and that is all that matters.  I work hard everyday to live in the present.  

The goal is to stay focused and keep smiling.  

Define "family"

Define the word "family"...... BUT, think about it before you do..... REALLY think about it....

There is immediate family: parents and siblings

Which later on encompasses: a spouse, in-laws, and your children

Which then includes: Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins

Then you add:  the friends you've had forever - and their kids/grandkids

THEN, the unthinkable happens (A death) and your family is fractured.....

If you are fortunate, someone special may come along and your family tree can start to blossom and thrive once again.....

Add: "Someone special", his children, their spouses, their children....

I am thinking "family" is not a 'thing to be defined', but a feeling.....  I am so grateful to be able to 'feel' again. 

We are 4...

We are 4 widows.  We met a little over a year ago.  We became friends in an instant.  We understood each other.  We supported each other.  We helped each other move forward.

We are 4 widows.  We had all been married for 35+ years.  We were all faced with the everlasting change  in our lives.  We understood that it was more than just losing a spouse.  Our lives, as we knew them, ceased to exist.  You can't explain that phenomenon to someone who has not experienced it.   People will say they understand.  Some people even think they understand.  Some might even "write the script" on how they think we should proceed with our lives.  

We are 4 widows.  We are always there for each other.  Somehow, we always know the 'right' words to say to comfort and support each other.  One of us can start a sentence, and the others will be able to finish it.  We get it.  We have learned how to curse like sailors and cry a million tears.  

We are 4 widows.  We have walked together to begin our new lives.  This was was not a path we chose, but a path we were put on, side by side.  We have helped each other realize that we were not 'broken', but just injured and we would eventually heal. We now know there will always be scars, but those scars will fade.  We have taught each other that it is possible to laugh again - really laugh and cry happy tears.  We have learned that it is possible to love again.

We are 4 vibrant, strong, sexy, incredible women.

Dancing With The Stars!

The Prince and I are taking Dance Lessons.  Every Monday night, for 2 hours, we don our dancing shoes and work very hard to learn something new.  This is followed up by nightly dance sessions in our kitchen (usually in pajamas) where we try to remember everything we were taught that week.

The fox trot, merengue, tango and salsa are our newly acquired talents!  (talents??)  We have also learned:

We CAN stay up past 9:00pm

We CAN move steadily for 2 consecutive hours

We CAN follow directions

We CAN laugh at our mistakes and revel in our victories

We CAN fall in love over and over

It's not how good the dance is..... it's all about how much we enjoy our lives.

On the road to recovery

The Prince and I have just survived our first medical emergency.  

He had been fighting a cold for about a week - and we both thought he was winning the battle until that one morning when he just did not look so good to me.  I stayed with him just to watch him for a while and he started to look a little better, so I went to work.  A few hours later, I texted him and he told me he was sleeping all morning, but I just did not like the combination of too much sleep and the way he looked in the morning.  I left work early and took him to Urgent Care (in his pajamas, as he said he just did not want to get dressed).  From Urgent Care, we headed to the hospital (after I made a pit stop home to give the contractor the key, and pick up a few items for the two of us as I was preparing for the inevitable).

My prince had the beginnings of bilateral pneumonia.  The X-Rays proved that it was just in the earliest stage.  They opted to admit him ("us" actually, as I was not leaving his side) and promptly put us in isolation.  They filled him full of round the clock IV Antibiotics and we killed the time talking, laughing and playing games on our phones.  There was some sleep involved, but mostly for him.  As I think I have perfected the art of sleeping at a hospital bedside on chairs, my mind was racing the whole time and sleep mostly evaded me.

I am happy to say that all's well that ends well.  Thank you to the doctors and nurses who took such good care of my honey.  Thank you to my sonny boy who hurried to our house and picked up all the dogs so I didn't have to come home at all.  Thank you to my contractor who finished our bathroom and took such good care of our house.  Thank you to the "C-Unit" for having the trust in me to take care of their Dad.

Thank you, God, for my new life.    

Things I have learned (or re-learned) lately....

Even when you think your heart is at maximum capacity, you can always love a little more.

I can't please all of the people all of the time.  I can't even please some of the people all of the time!  I must remember to be pleased with myself MOST of the time!

Going through life with someone who loves me by my side is a whole lot better than doing it alone.  (I already knew this - I am just so grateful that God sent me my Prince.)

Every time I hold our new granddaughter, I am reminded that life, indeed, does go on.

"Things" have no value - they can be bought, sold, and tossed away.  People have value.  Memories have value.

Change is inevitable.  No need to "write the book" for the future.  It is a lot more exciting to live it as it happens.

There are happy tears and there are sad tears.  Both have a purpose in my life.  

The wisest people know that wealth is not measured in dollars.  


"I am wealthy."  

My heart grows.....again....

"Our" granddaugher arrived last week.  Jamie was born 2/16/17.  She is beautiful, she is perfect, and she is loved.

Jamie is so fortunate to be born into this amazing family.  She has wonderful parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins who will tend to her every earthly need.  She also has her Papa, (Mr. Wonderful) in Heaven to watch over her and protect her all the days of her life.

There is nothing more precious than a child.  I truly believe that you can NEVER love TOO MANY children.  God has blessed me with many "grandchildren" who are not blood-related.  Each one has enriched my life and broadened my heart.  

I am so grateful that there will ALWAYS be room for one more......

I got a promotion!

My Prince and I have spoken of our relationship many times - and where we saw it heading.  We were both committed to each other, that was clear to us.  He loves me dearly and I feel the same.  That being said, marriage is out of the question as it makes no sense at our age and we both have chldren to consider.  I told him many times that I would gladly be his partner for the next 35 years!!

I had a very memorable Valentine's Day.  My prince outdid himself and made a very special effort to make sure this was a day I would not soon forget!  The very last gift for me to open was:

I have offically been promoted to "fiance`".... and we could not be happier 

To My Grandchild.....

To my Grandchild:

We have all been waiting for months for you to arrive.  It is just down to a matter of days right now.  There are so many things I want you to know and I will say them all to you once you are in my arms, but, for now, I will write some things down so you can read them later.

You are being born into a very special family.  We are loud and we are crazy.  We work hard and we play even harder.  Most importantly, we LOVE like no others!  When one member of this family is in pain, we all hurt.  And, when one member of this family has something to celebrate, we will all shout it from the highest rooftop and party like fools! 

I think what I want you know most is that you were loved before you even arrived!  We talked about you incessantly and made silly plans for you.  You had secured a place in all our hearts before we even knew your name!!  We all talked about how we were going to spoil you (and how your parents were going to hate us!)  

I know you will be held, hugged and kissed for as long as you will let us.  I know that every holiday  and every gathering will be centered around you.  I know that we will all look into your eyes and realize what a gift from God you are.

When you are ready to arrive, my angel, we will all be there - (if not in person, in spirit) to welcome you...

Love,
Your grandmother

If It's Thursday, we must be seeing.......

As I mentioned once or 22 times, between the Prince and I, there are lots of kids.

I am a "text book" Italian mom.  I believe we need to see each other often and talk even more often. This is fine for my kids - they are so used to hearing my voice.  My children all live rather close-by, so seeing them on a weeknight is not unheard of.

The Prince, on the other hand, has his offspring spread a little further away.   There needs to be careful planning and often, an overnight stay.  However, that's no obstacle for a couple who decide it is time for us to see "the kids"!  There is a laundry list of chores to be complete before we hit the road: book hotel, make arrangements for the dog, pack the clothes, pack snacks for the car, remember to take phone chargers!, pack more snacks for the car.  We seem to have this process down "to a dance" (yes, everything is music/dance related!)  

This weekend, we were up at 4:30am and hit the road by 5.  Our drive consisted of drinking coffee, singing to the "oldies", talking endlessly and just looking forward to our time with the grandkids.  Upon entering their house and hearing the squeals of delight, surely there was no place else we would have wanted to be!  Spending time with children, and their candid demeanor was like getting the batteries in our heart fully charged!  

Impromptu hugs and kisses, reading book after book, sharing meals, little hands reaching up to hold our hands  - a memorable trip.

Another First!

The Prince and I just returned from a vacation in Florida.  We booked this a while ago....quite early in our relationship, actually!  WHAT WAS I THINKING????

I'll tell you what I was thinking.....  I've met a wonderful man.  He is sweet and kind and treats me like a lady.  He makes me laugh and I look forward to seeing him every single day.  This man asked me to join him on a trip to Florida in January.... Of course I want to go!!  "Yes", I eagerly responded!  Only time would tell if this trip would actually come to fruition.  

Well, the trip did happen - and it was fabulous!  My daughter says the true test of  a relationship is going away and spending 24/7 together.  Well, we spent the last 9 days together - NON-STOP....  We were both a little sad when I had to go to work today.  

I am so grateful for this second chance at life.  Perhaps it is the history that we bring to the table, but we both seem to enjoy each and every day together.  We continue to make simple, but sweet memories.  Whether we are cleaning the house, doing the Sunday crossword or slow dancing in the kitchen, we manage to savor each moment and take nothing for granted.  

"Tomorrow" is promised to no one..... so grateful for our 'todays'.

I'm how old???

I am 60.  There, I've said it out loud!  It's really not such a big deal, but I've had fun pretending it was.  Nearly all my friends have passed this benchmark already.  I took every opportunity to remind them how "young" I was and they all reveled in the fact that I have finally moved over to "the dark side".

This was not only a 'milestone' birthday, but a very special one indeed.  My kids had a "surprise" party for me on New Year's Day.  I thought we were getting together for brunch - and we did - but with balloons, a sash and a tiara!   Allison cooked up an amazing spread and the weather was just picture perfect.  Their thoughtful, generous gifts were second to the best birthday cards I have ever received.  Even my Prince presented me with the most perfect card!!

I thought the celebration was over until I arrived home after work on my birthday.  There were balloons on the lamppost and mailbox.  PC showered me with more gifts and yet ANOTHER perfect card (it's all about the card, ya know!)

Age is just a number - if you let it be so.  All I want to do is enjoy my life....everyday, and hope for another birthday.  

New Year's Resolutions?

I have never been big on New Year's Resolutions.... but I do try to make subtle changes to better myself all the time.  There have been many positive changes in my life this year.  I am aware and grateful for every one of them.

Rather than a  list of Resolutions, I think I checklist is better suited for me right now:

Always be grateful for my blessings.  They are present in my everyday life and I must never take them for granted.

Remember to look for the good in people.  Sometimes, I will have to look long and hard, but, with perseverance, I will always find it.

It's the little things that matter.  The price of gas or the closing numbers of the stock market will not make me sleep better.  But if I was the reason someone smiled, I will have a happy heart.

I will tell those that are close to me that I love them all the time.  Saying it and hearing it will etch the sentiment in our hearts.

Above all, never stop being the "romantic realist"

Happy New Year.... Welcome 2017.

Christmas Re-Cap

This was a VERY different Christmas for me.  Christmas was ALWAYS celebrated with my children. Since compromise is the key to a successful relationship.... we headed to Pennsylvania and spent it with Prince Charming's children.... all of them.  What a gift!  

First, a particular thank you goes out to my children who were understanding and supportive of my decision to "spend it with my other family".  I saw them all prior to Christmas - and we will all be together on New Year's Day.  I am grateful that we all live close by and can see each other often.

Next, a special thank you goes out to the "C-Unit" for their warmth and acceptance.  It was a perfect weekend!  Having little ones around just added to the magic that we call Christmas.  There were too many hugs and kisses to count.   There were special moments that will be forever etched into my memory.... eating, drinking, dancing, watching the kids play with their toys (the BIG kids with their remote controlled cars and playing with the LITTLE KIDS' Legos), cuddling on the couch to watch movies, etc.

Top 5:
- Having a stress-free drive each way (read that: NO TRAFFIC)

- Remembering to bring everything that we planned

- Getting unsolicited hugs from the babies

- Watching the BIG kids interact with each other with love in their eyes

- Seeing my Prince so happy and enjoying every minute....


Christmas miracles are always present... you just need to know where to look for them.

Put in on paper.... put it to rest

So, were things ever going so good that you started to stress about "waiting for the other shoe to drop"?  Well, that happened to me this week.  Once you start that downward spiral, you can only let go of the handrail and hope you land on your feet.

I decided to share my anxiety with the Prince.  I needed to express the turmoil in my brain in a way that did NOT make me sound like a lunatic.  He is an avid Islander fan....

Me:  Let's say the Islanders have won 15 games in a row.  OK, I know they are not having a great season, JUST PLAY ALONG!!!  So, with each passing game, you start to get nervous that they will lose..... Things have been going so good in our life, I'm afraid of losing a game.

Him: Hey, we are bound to lose a game now and then.... but we will ALWAYS have a winning season!

...enough said.....

Date night???

The Prince and I went "Christmas shopping" last night - not for gifts, but for clothes for us to wear this holiday season.

First, we shopped for him:

Me:  You need a nice dress shirt and a handsome sweater to go over it.

Him:  I have shirts in the closet.

Me:  (smiling) I know, sweetheart, let's just look around.

Him: (picking up an orange and green plaid shirt) How's this?  The colors are so festive!

Me: (throwing up in my mouth) That's nice, hon, but maybe we should look for something a little more subdued.  Look at this shirt! (navy with grey pinstripes)

RESULT:  2 classic dress shirts and 2 gorgeous sweaters - 

(Note to self:  Never send him out to buy his own clothes!)


Next, we shopped for me:

Me:  Do you like this?

Him:  You already have a lot of pink.

Me:  Is this long enough?

Him: (with a scrunched up face) I don't think so.

Me:  What about this one?

Him: That's perfect.

Me: Let's buy it in 2 colors, I'm done shopping!

RESULT: We are both prepared for the holidays.  

(Note to self: Life is good with the Prince by my side.)

The Christmas Letter

Each year, I receive several Christmas Letters where people tell me everything that has happened to them this past year.

That made me think about my life this past year...... perhaps the letter would sound like this:

Winter 2016
Well, I've made it through my first holiday season.  It sucked, but I survived.  Keeping my eye on May 26 - I am sure my life will change after that.

Spring 2016
Thankful that it was a mild Winter.  Just one real snowstorm, and my kind neighbors cleared it away for me.  Grateful that I have been able to get away often.  Looking forward to the milder weather.  Keeping my eye on the calendar.  I promised myself to make positive changes and become a human being again.

May 2016
The month came and went.  Whereas I will always mourn Mr. Wonderful's passing, I know I will be okay.  I know I am in charge of my life.  I know my kids are keeping a watchful eye on me, from a safe distance.  I am standing tall, once again. 

Summer, Fall, Winter 2016
Got my life on track.  Ventured out into the "real" world.  Met some other widows who are trying to get their lives back, as well.  Kissed a couple frogs.  Met my prince.

To Tree or Not To Tree

I haven't put a Christmas Tree up in a couple years.  For one reason or another, it just did not seem important.  

This year, I will be spending Christmas weekend in Pennsylvania with my Prince and his family.  We will celebrate Christmas with my family shortly thereafter.

It seems Christmas has just snuck up on me this year!   We've been talking about it for weeks - trying to plan.... but there were so many kids to consider..... Now that the holiday is quickly approaching. there just isn't the time (or necessity) to put up a tree.

Next year will be different.  We will start planning in July.... There will be 2 new babies in the family.  We have agreed to attempt a "yours, mine, and ours" Christmas celebration.  Now, how do I get 8 kids and their respective families on board with this???? 

Perhaps we should not wait until July.... 

Thanksgiving Re-Cap

This was the first Thanksgiving I had ever spent without anyone from my "biological" family present.  I guess I now know how my kids feel when they have a holiday with "the in-laws".   The Prince and I realize things can become a little complicated... sharing our time between our kids.  The bottom line is, it is our time now and as long as we are together, everything else will fall into place.

It was a little strange, at first, being the only 'outsider' at a major holiday dinner.  However, the "C-Unit" is indeed very charming (it's in their genes) and they made me feel wanted and welcome.  It was fun to hear them tell me stories about Prince Charming - as only an offspring could tell.  I am sure I had heard some of these stories from the Prince in the past, but their versions are what I will always remember.

PC's  grandchildren were there - 19 months, 25 months and 5 yrs old.  Imagine my delight, being on the floor, interacting with the 3 of them!  There is nothing sweeter than an unsolicited hug from a child.  

I don't recall much about the food or drink.  I barely remember the 4 hours in the car that day.  What I will never forget is how I felt as I went to bed that night.  Everyone sleeps better when they have a content heart.